The Complete Guide to Not Giving a Fuck

by Julien Smith

“Ok, I have a confession to make. I have spent almost my whole life – 31 years – caring far too much about offending people, worrying if I’m cool enough for them, or asking myself if they are judging me. I can’t take it anymore. It’s stupid, and it’s not good for my well being. It has made me a punching bag – a flighty, nervous wuss. But worse than that, it has made me someone who doesn’t take a stand for anything. It has made me someone who stood in the middle, far too often, and not where I cared to stand, for fear of alienating others. No more. Not today. Today, ladies and gentlemen, is different. We’re going to talk about the cure. We’re going to talk about what’s necessary. We’re going to talk about the truth. Do you wonder if someone is talking shit about you? Whether your friends will approve? Have you become conflict-avoidant? Spineless? Well, it’s time you started not giving a fuck.”

Hit the link for the rest of the article: http://inoveryourhead.net/the-complete-guide-to-not-giving-a-fuck/

[ Oh noes - seems Julien’s blog has been Lifehackered :-p Be patient, it takes a while to load - or check back in a few, it’s literally a fuck-awesome read! ]

Sex Scandal Has U.S. Buddhists Looking Within

By MARK OPPENHEIMER

Published: August 20, 2010

Sooner or later, every traditional faith has to confront sexual impropriety by its spiritual leaders: extramarital sex, or sex with the wrong people (members of the congregation, minors) or, for supposedly celibate clergy, any sex at all.

But there are great differences in how religions handle these transgressions. For Jews and many Protestants, it is the local congregation that decides what sins are too great to countenance, and what kind of discipline is needed. For Roman Catholics, a worldwide hierarchy decides, depending on reports from local representatives. And for Buddhists — well, the answer is not so clear.

The root of the problem, some experts say, is that the teacher/student relationship in Buddhism has no obvious Western analogy. Priests and rabbis know the boundaries, even if some do not always respect them. Doctors, too, have ethical canons they are supposed to honor. A spiritual figure like a priest, an authority figure like a teacher, a therapeutic figure like an analyst — the Buddhist teacher may be all of those, but is not really like any one of them. Even sanghas, or Buddhist communities, that discourage such relationships often have no process for enforcing a ban, and as one Zen society in New York is learning, that can lead to problems.

Read the full article http://www.nytimes.com/2010/08/21/us/21beliefs.html?_r=2&scp=2&sq=zen&st=cse

http://youarenotsosmart.com/

Catharsis

The Misconception: Venting your anger is an effective way to reduce stress and prevent lashing out at friends and family.

The Truth: Venting increases aggressive behavior over time.

Let it out.

Don’t hold it all in.

Left inside you, the anger will fester and spread, grow like a tumor, boil up until you punch holes in the wall or slam your car door so hard the windows shatter.

Those dark thoughts shouldn’t be tamped down inside your heart where they can condense and strengthen, where they form a concentrated stockpile of negativity which could reach critical mass at any moment.

Go get yourself one of those squishy balls and work it over with death grips. Use both hands and choke the imaginary life out of it.

Head to the gym and assault a punching bag. Shoot some people in a video game. Scream into a pillow.

Feel better? Sure you do. Venting feels great.

The problem is, it accomplishes little else. Actually, it makes matters worse and primes your future behavior by fogging your mind.

Follow the link for the rest of the article: http://youarenotsosmart.com/2010/08/11/catharsis/#more-833

( I must add that had I considered this a couple years ago I would have saved myself and a few lovely people an AWFUL LOT OF GRIEF).

Do yourself a favour and make some time to read the TRULY AWESOME http://youarenotsosmart.com

PS: The article linked in the hulk pic is also quite interesting and one hell of a great read.